A Guide to Same-Sex Engagement & Wedding Bands: Celebrating LGBTQ+
A gemmologist with decades of experience and multiple qualifications, Eddi revels in creating unique jewellery designs with his clients. Influenced by his time in Glasgow, NYC and South America, he brings a wordly perspective in his approach to jewellery design.
In modern romance, traditions are evolving, and few choices reflect that shift more powerfully than the rings couples choose to symbolise their commitment. For LGBTQ+ and non-binary partners, engagement and wedding rings offer the freedom to move beyond “his and hers,” and instead create something truly personal.
Whether that means a pair of perfectly matched bands, two distinct but complementary designs or rings that celebrate identity through meaningful details, like rainbow gemstones or bespoke engraving, the focus is no longer on following convention, but on reflecting who you are.
At Queensmith, we’re proud to support every couple in creating jewellery that honours your story, your values and your future – crafted with care, sourced responsibly and made to last a lifetime.
This guide contains:
Before you purchase your engagement ring as an LGBTQ+ couple
From deciding who will propose to whether you both want to exchange engagement rings, same-sex and non-binary couples often navigate decisions that fall outside traditional expectations. These conversations – about roles, rings and representation – become part of your story, and when approached openly, they help ensure both partners feel seen, heard and equally involved.
It’s also an opportunity to talk about the practicalities, from budgets and timelines to how (or if) you’d like to express pride within your rings. For some, that might mean subtle, personal details. For others, a bolder design or symbolic gemstone that speaks to your identity. However you choose to mark the moment, the result should feel like you.
Whether you're drawn to matching rings, complementary designs or something completely individual, LGBTQ+ engagement rings are a beautiful reflection of both your connection and your individuality. Here are five meaningful engagement ring ideas to inspire your journey...
5 LGBTQ+ engagement ring ideas
#1. The 'wedding-and-engagement-ring' ring
In non-binary and same-sex relationships, gone are the traditional confines of a man proposing to a woman (which is a pretty outdated rule to abide by anyway), meaning many gay couples reach a mutual decision to get married without a surprise proposal. And where there is no surprise proposal, there is no surprise engagement ring – so why not combine your engagement ring and wedding ring into one?
Add a little sparkle and detail to the ring you’ll don at your nuptials with a small diamond: not-quite-a-wedding-ring, not-quite-an-engagement-ring, but a fantastic (and beautiful) symbol of your partnership nonetheless. Equally, an eternity ring is a beautiful symbol of your eternal love for your partner. Whether you plan on getting married or not, such a romantic gift is sure to bag you major brownie points.
#2. One ring for me, one ring for you
Who should wear the engagement ring in a gay partnership? Even if you’re the one proposing, there’s nothing to stop you both from wearing an engagement ring. Alternatively, you may come to the mutual decision to get married – so why not challenge your partner to design each other’s rings?
Creating a pair of rings with a shared characteristic but different overall look is a great idea. That could be choosing the same cut of diamond, opting for the same milgrain detailing or using a certain coloured gemstone for detailing. Think about what’s important to you and what would be a great symbol of your relationship.
#3. Gender-neutral wedding rings
Your engagement ring can be as gender-neutral as you want it to be, whether that’s jazzing up a thick, plain band with the odd diamond, using black diamonds to create an eternity ring, or simply opting for a plain band.
#4. Boundary breaking bespoke rings
Many Hatton Garden jewellers have been family-owned for decades, which is not to say they don’t move with the times. It can, however, be tricky to find something that differs from the norms of what can be an incredibly traditional industry.
Whether you’re searching for gay and lesbian engagement rings, you may feel what’s on offer doesn’t quite reflect you enough. Blurring the lines between what is traditionally feminine or masculine is exciting, and only you and your partner will know exactly what is right for you, so get creative!
The beauty of bespoke jewellery means you can inject as much of your unique personality into your ring as you like. We’re predicting big things for gender-neutral engagement rings because the nature of bespoke is all about finding what’s right for you and your partner, not what lores and traditions have told us to do for hundreds of years. At Queensmith, our team of design experts will help you piece together the ring that's totally right for you.
#5. Diamond rings for all
Who’s to say you can’t don a super traditional, super sparkly diamond engagement ring? We’re all guilty of ogling the solitaire, halo and diamond band engagement rings we see dotted across our Instagram feeds. Alternatively, opt for a diamond eternity ring and get your sparkle on!
How to plan your proposal
Proposing to your partner is a deeply personal milestone, and while the "traditional" rules are changing, the preparation remains much the same. Whether you are a same-sex couple or part of the wider LGBTQ+ community, the focus should be on creating a moment that reflects your unique relationship rather than sticking to outdated conventions.
#1. Define the style and metal
Start by observing the jewellery your partner already wears. Do they lean towards the cool tones of platinum and white gold, or the classic warmth of yellow gold? For a minimalist, a classic solitaire is timeless, whereas an edgy or modern personality might prefer geometric cuts or unconventional settings. If you’re unsure, discreetly photographing their current collection can be a huge help when you visit a jeweller.
#2. Set a comfortable budget
Ignore the "three months' salary" myth. A meaningful engagement ring budget is simply what feels right for your financial situation. Setting this figure early helps you navigate your options – from lab grown diamonds to vibrant sapphires – without feeling overwhelmed.
#3. Navigate the "who proposes?"
Dynamic In many LGBTQ+ relationships, there isn't a "standard" blueprint for who pops the question. You might choose to propose to your partner, decide to shop for rings together or even plan a "double proposal" where you both exchange rings. Remember: there are no rules. This is your opportunity to bring in your own special moments and rewrite the script to suit your journey.
#4. Find the right size
Finding your partner's ring size can be the trickiest part if you plan to make the proposal a surprise. If you can, "borrow" a ring they wear on their ring finger for a day so a jeweller can record the size. If that isn’t possible, don't panic, most Queensmith designs can be expertly resized later to ensure a perfect fit.
#5. Focus on the personal touch
Ultimately, the most memorable proposals are those that prioritise thoughtfulness over the price tag. Whether it’s an engraving of a significant date, choosing a bespoke design that incorporates a hidden detail or simply the words you say in the moment, personalisation makes the ring feel priceless.
A community to be proud of: Queensmith LGBTQ+ couples
Queensmith is proud to play a small part in the love stories of our LGBTQ+ clients. It has always been important to us to make ourselves visible as an LGBTQ+ inclusive jewellers, amongst an industry that can otherwise feel archaic. Together with our design experts, create something that's totally right for you and your love – your way.
Same-Sex Engagement & Wedding Rings FAQs
Do you have additional questions? No problem, let us help you through the process
There are a lot of gay and lesbian couples who exchange engagement rings. Of course there's no set rule, instead, it all comes down to what you and your partner feel is right. Some couples wait until the wedding to exchange rings, while others both wear engagement bands or only one partner does. While some choose to wait for the wedding rings, others want to mark the commitment immediately after the proposal by wearing an engagement ring.
Not at all! Matching wedding rings is a beautiful option, but it’s by no means a requirement. Some couples love the symbolism of matching rings, while others feel that having unique rings better reflects their individuality within the relationship. We always suggest our customers choose what resonates with their relationship, not what tradition dictates.
The conventional approach is taken by many gay couples, who, like straight couples, wear their wedding bands on the left hand. To defy convention and represent their LGBTQ+ status, some people, however, opt to wear them on their right hand.
Like everyone else, a lot of lesbians wear their wedding and engagement rings on their left hand's "ring finger," or fourth finger. However, if they desire a more distinctive twist or a more intimate custom, some couples decide to wear rings on their right hand or even choose a different finger entirely.
The rainbow flag, pink triangles, gender symbols, Celtic knots, infinity symbols or braided bands are some of the common symbols in LGBT engagement rings.
Yellow gold, platinum and rose gold are all popular with same-sex couples. Which they choose is dependent on the couples’ preferences and skin tone. If you want a warm and romantic hue, rose gold is the perfect choice. For something durable, modern and sleek then platinum is the one for you. For more information, read our Ring Metal Guide.
In England and Wales, the same-sex marriage act was approved in 2013, and as of March 29, 2014, couples are legally permitted to get married. LGBTQ+ couples have two choices for their special day thanks to this:
Marriage: Many locations in England and other UK countries have chosen to marry same-sex couples.
Civil partnerships: These don't have any religious overtones and are open to all couples, regardless of sexual orientation.
There are less rigid same-sex marriage and more flexible traditions surrounding same-sex marriages. This implies that you have complete control over how your wedding day is organised.
Do you have additional questions? No problem, let us help you through the process
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